It’s cool when grandparents are there to help take care of their grandkids.
However, sometimes they break the child’s boundaries, which results in a lot of misunderstanding and mistrust.
A Reddit user shared her story where she told about her MIL who lied to everyone around and cut her daughter’s hair.
Here is how it all went, “I have a 14-year-old daughter, she has long and curly hair.
My mother-in-law had recently taken my daughter over for the weekend at her and my husband’s father’s house.
They’ve had my daughter over for weekends and holiday stays before, so I wasn’t worried about anything happening, and my daughter seemed fine during our morning and nightly phone calls.
Today, when my MIL dropped her off, I was shocked to see her almost waist-length hair was now shoulder-length and that it was now straightened.
My girl has been determined to grow her hair out since she was in the sixth grade and has expressed no desire to straighten her normally curly hair before.”
“She was crying and explained to me that her grandma had done this all herself, and lied to her that I gave my permission for my MIL to do this which is why she didn’t mention it when we talked.
Needless to say, I was pissed and after comforting my daughter, I told my husband what happened, and we talked for an hour about what we should do about the situation.
We eventually came to the agreement that my MIL wouldn’t be seeing her granddaughter alone until she learned to respect her boundaries.
We ended up calling my FIL to see if he had anything to do with this, and he was horrified when we explained things to him and said that my MIL gave him the same lie about getting my permission to do this.”
“My FIL apologized profusely before hanging up, and I ended up sending a text to my MIL about how she was unable to see her granddaughter alone until she apologized for what she did and learned to respect our daughter’s boundaries.
It was quiet for a while until my husband and I started getting bombarded with texts from both my MIL and my SIL.
My MIL is furious with me for trying to keep her away from her granddaughter, and for telling my FIL what happened because he’s now staying in a hotel and contemplating their marriage.
SIL is saying it wasn’t a crime for my MIL to act in my daughter’s best interest even if she went behind my back because clearly I wasn’t going to take care of her.”
Other Reddit users supported the author with the following words: It wasn’t your daughter’s best interest. It actively went against her desires and her body autonomy. She lied to your daughter, to her husband, and actively did something she clearly knew was wrong.
Well, she gets to pay the price. She’s one of those people who doesn’t believe any boundaries are meant for her, and she doesn’t have to respect them. And telling your daughter that you approved…that’s just disgusting.
Might be time to explain to that no one has permission to do anything against her wishes. If it’s something she doesn’t like, needs to call mum and dad asap. I hate it when adults cut hair without asking. She lied, violated a SERIOUS boundary, and hurt your kid (emotionally). You’re being very kind and generous with even giving her a way to regain contact. Here is another story where a daughter cut off all ties with her mom and then showed up asking to babysit her kids.